Aberdeen Angus is a huge hairy man who lives in a small stinky pond called Scotland. He and his brother, Furgus, chew Cheese Hubba-Bubba and have grown to 2ft in height and 30 ft wide. He is hunted with only his cunning to protect him, for the valuable hair which covers his large feet. The hair is made from an egg white and flour base, which is then baked for 12 years before it is glazed with icing sugar and dogmeat.
He also has a large horn which protubes from a hairy mass on his face and his balls.
He and his brother also believe in the Beano and lick Dennis the Menace's dad.
He and his brother do not like to talk about Red Indians and Emilio Estefan in lipstick. He also has a large anus that smells and poo comes out.