From Encyclopaedia Daemonica
Jump to: navigation, search

I'm Tamia; fly me!

~ Tamia

For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Airplane.
The first kitten to fly; and he wasn't even huffed!

Airplanes were invented by J. Troy Gray after the debut of the 1954 film Airplane! They are magical floating devices which are designed to crash and burn, widely used by wealthy Americans and Japanese businessmen as a form of transportation when teleporters are unavailable. The modern airplane has a shitty excellent safety record, one of the best in history. That's why there were approx. 1,000,000 airline calamities last year, and counting (they still have to find the planes that vanished in the Bermuda Triangle).

To keep airplanes light, the aluminum skin is quite thin. So, how are dents prevented when you see so many on stronger steel car skins? Well, because there are too many people who just don't care about their own cars and are super lazy and ignorant. However, people with airplanes actually give a crap about their investments. Because Airplanes are so well engineered, with precision, accuracy, and advanced math, old people are so cynical that they hate airplanes, due to their thin, easy to dent bodies.