Amy Acker

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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Amy Acker.
You should see her with glasses!

Amy Louise Acker born December 5, 1976 in Dallas, Texas is an American actress. She was created in a laboratory by the U.S. government to be the most adorable caucasian female ever to walk the Earth. Though the original project was to create the most adorable female of any race, it was finally admitted by the project designers that no caucasian can be cuter than the cutest Asian, not even a caucasian genetically engineered for that purpose.


Though her early career as a genetically engineered cutie took the form of a fulfilling life being dressed up in schoolgirl attire and sucking lollipops, she eventually escaped from the lab and eked out a passable existence ushering passengers through Dallas-Fort Worth International Airport and was paid in Taco Bell food.

While living on her own, she adopted a Jack Russell terrier named Wishbone who knew a guy who knew a guy and got them both parts on a television show for slow children. Though Acker got second billing to a dog, she later got revenge when she became more famous and stopped returning his phone calls.

After a number of small parts including an unfortunate turn in a movie written and directed by William "The Shat" Shatner, she was cast in the role of Winnifred Burkle on Angel. Playing a cutie, she found the role was perfectly engineered for a woman engineered to be cute.

The 2005 season of Alias marked her latest appearance as a television series regular. She played a villain in what was largely considered the most adorable portrayal of a baddie since Shirley Temple played the title role in Nosferatu.

Personal life[edit]

Acker is married with two children which qualifies her as a MILF. Her son was born with no fewer than two surnames in 2005, and her daughter was born in September of 2006, and just so we're clear, I call dibs just in case. As unlikely as it is that the marriage is a sham and she is having a torrid affair with sometimes castmate Alyson Hannigan, some still hold out hope.