Anti-Uncyclopedia is a rebel group which despises Uncyclopedia and all its users, practises and content, actively seeking to have the wiki eliminated. Led by founder Jimbo Wales, the group is mostly made up of Wikipedians and Encyclopedia Dramaticists all with the sole consensus that Uncyclopedia's growth is detrimental to world
- 1 Etymology
- 2 History
- 3 Covert Operations
- 4 Vandalism
- 5 Perceived involvement of Google
- 6 Members
- 7 See Also
Contrary to popular belief, the Anti-Uncyclopedia do not actaually take their name from the Latin Antæ-Uncyclopædium, meaning "opposite uncyclopedia", but from Ancient Greek Αν τε υνι υνυ ενκυκλοσπεδιυμ (An te uni unu kuklos pedium), lterally "Against you ones only encyclopedia", or roughly "Against you ones of the Uncyclopedia".
Uncyclopedis Sukius Destructum
Anti-Uncyclopedians pride themselves on their motto Uncyclopedius suckius destructum, from Wikiese. It is partially from Ancient Greek Υνυ ενκυκλοσπεδιυμ δεστρυγυμ (Unu enkuklopedium destrugum, "Only encyclopedia destruction" or "Uncyclopedia destruction"), and partially from Latin Sukium, meaning "Sucky". So Uncyclopedis sukius destructum literally translates as "Only encyclopedia sucky destruction", or "Destroy sucky Uncyclopedia". Translated correctly into Wikiese, however, brings the equivalent of "seeking to destroy the suck-pit that is Uncyclopedia".
Origins (995 BC - 133 BC)
The Anti-Uncyclopedia movement was founded in approximately 995 BC by Wikipedia co-founder and ogre Jimbo Wales (we're pretty sure it's him, and if not, George Lucas). Seeing the wiki's existence as a threat to his empire of Wikipedia, Wales set about gaining support to eradicate Uncyclopedia altogether. For further information and historical contextualisation, see History of Wikiland.
The methods employed to carry this out are highly guarded, held deep within the vaults of Wikipedia headquarters under protection of guards armed with Cake Cannons. However it is thought that a team of trained mutants are working hard in conjunction with Livejournal users in a darkened room to plot Uncyclopedia's downfall. Utilising a
variety of hacking techniques 1996 Windows Operating System, members often break into the accounts of major users in order to cause disruption in VFH voting and posting sub-standard images at VFP.
The Assassination attempt of Chronarion (132 BC)
- Go to the capital of Uncyclopedia
- Sneak into Chronarion's palace
- Kill the guards with useless trivia about rubix cubes and sudokus
- Go to Chronarion's chamber
- Wake up Chronarion in the guise of his children
- Stick a knife through the heart of Chroniarion
The plan failed at step 5 (September 15) when it was revealed that Chron had no children, who impaled Larry Sanger with his own knife.
Dark Ages (131 BC - 62 AC)
After the death of Larry Sanger, the Anti-Uncyclopedia had to find a replacement. They found just the man - Monsieur Pelican Shit, Duke of Normandy. While Jimbo and The Vandal were busy plotting against the Uncyclopedia, Pelican Shit edited Wikipedia and Encyclopedia Dramatica. For 193 years the nation of Wikiland were in a crisis, with food supplies dwindling and pelican shit on the rise. In the year 63 AC, the Second Invasion of Wikiland began.
Second Invasion of Wikiland (63 AC)
The first invasion of Wikiland resulted in the entire population of Euroipods and most of the Kamelopedii destroyed, with significant losses to the Wikipedia. Yet the second invasion was more cruel. The Chronicles of Uncyclopedia list the cities plundered and the approximate number of losses in an attempt to destroy Jimbo Wales and Princess Angela, leaders of the Anti-Uncyclopedia.
- En (45,000)
- Tp (42,000)
- Meta (39,000)
- Fr (38,500)
- Es (34,000)
- Wikimediafoundation (26,000)
- La (21,500)
- Ar (14,500)
- He (13,500)
- Species (10,000)
- Yo (8,500)
- Vi (3,500)
- Et (2,000)
- El (1,500)
- It (1,500)
- De (1,500)
- Hi (1,000)
In this plunder, 69,000 more Wikipedians were taken hostage and 460,000 were left mortally injured, a massive 10 times more than in the first invasion. Ultimately, only Pelican Shit was found by the Uncyclopedians.
Seige of Uncyclopedia (62 - 72 AC)
For revenge against the destruction of their cities, the Anti-Uncyclopedian army launched a 10-year siege against Uncyclopedia. As revenge, the chronicles report that Jimbo heartlessly murdered 162,468,214 Uncyclopedians from Uncyclopedia.de, the first city of which the Anti-Uncyclopedia stumbled across. In the french city 214,862,931 were slaughtered, and in the english state 2,429,573,583 were destroyed. The Anti-Uncyclopedians took the Uncyclopedians into slavery. Says the chronicles:
The AU's actions earned a place on the international news on 4 April with their mass vandalisation of Uncyclopedia with a load of cliched quotes from Steve Ballmer and the posting of actual information on a large number of articles. This lead to major changes in the site's policy as well as a major cleanup operation which greatly affected the wiki in the weeks following.
The following month, one member managed to post an article on Uncyclopedia entitled 'Uncyclopedia is the worst' under a secretive alias. Masquerading as a genuine article parodying the Anti-Uncyclopedians themselves, the article was featured on the front page on 19th May. However the move backfired when genuine Uncyclopedians got hold of the idea and manipulated it into a scathing attack on AU, causing massive ripples throughout the organisation, with each of the seventeen members expressing their disgust at the incident at the annual AU meet in Slough. Indeed, many members punished themselves by joining a conversation at the Uncyclopedia chat room.
The AU has been largely unsuccessful in all previous attempts to completely eradicate Uncyclopedia. However it has succeeded in numerous other small victories, temporarily disabling the wiki a number of times: it is thought that 95% of Uncyclopedia's downtime in the period January - March 2006 was due to the AU's efforts. However the powers that be, who deny the existence of the AU, refute this, instead claim that server difficulties are caused by careless technical workers spilling coffee over the server.
The stock action of the active Anti-Uncyclopedian is to vandalise the wiki. This is most often carried out under the safety of anonymous IP's. Range blocks are generally not a problem: a hardcore group of persistent AU members have purchased Volkswagen camper vans and travel the world over, leeching from library computers, Internet Cafes and public web points. This caused a massive problems for Uncyclopedia, who in retalliation announced their own version of Wikipedia's Anti-vandalism unit: they huffed a sackload of crud.
Members are also highly educated in the principles and guidelines of the wiki and have developed intricate and detailed methods of vandalisation. The spamming of the system with multi-accounts and sockpuppets is a technique often utilised by the AU. These have been witnessed to consist of inconspicuous usernames such as Uncyclopedia_Sucks, I_Hate_Uncyclopedia and Hate_Hate_Hat and are deviously hard to spot. Thus, they exist on the wiki for long periods of time, making minor edits made indetectable by being sandwiched between 'genuine' good faith edits. These have generally upset the make up of Uncyclopedia, making more work for the already
underworked overworked administrators.
The most effective vandalisation of Uncyclopedia to date, however, has been the breakage into Uncyclopedia headquarters, the smashing of servers with a mallet and spraying of graffiti over the walls. This caused seven minutes downtime on 19th April 2006, making the international news in the process.
Perceived involvement of Google
In March 2006, reports claimed that many employees of world-wide-web superpower Google were members of the Anti-Uncyclopedia group. This was evidenced by Google's refusal to acknowledge the very existence of Uncyclopedia, declining to list the site on its search database.
More recent reports have disproved this theory to be utter hogwash. The actual reason given for the omission is that each time an Uncyclopedian requests the site be added to the database, a Google employee adds the other Uncyclopedia. Either that, or everyone at the contact centre was on an impromptu lunch break at the time.
Due to the high secrecy level of Anti-Uncyclopedia, aside from leader Jimbo Wales, not a lot is known about the current members. However, some ex-AU members have admitted they, at some point in time, were associated with the organisation. In doing so they risk life and limb, facing potential maulings by the Feral Wikipedians which AU employs.
- Larry Page and Sergey Brin, Google founders.
- Nikki Lesson, owner of the 'other' Uncyclopedia.
- You, you traitor.
- 127.0.0.1, the most evil vandal about.
- History of Wikiland
- Uncyclopedia Vandals
- Uncyclopedia is the worst An article made by an Anti-Uncyclopedian.