Category:Oscar Wildeizms

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"There is only one thing in the world worse than quoting Oscar Wilde and that is being quoted by Oscar Wilde."

~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe on Oscar Wilde

"HÁ! I'll quote you now!!!"

~ Oscar Wilde on Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Oscar "The Pimp" Wilde ( 1337 - 1900 ) was an Irish tone poet, a war elephant in the Pubic wars, martial artist, musician, owner of Richard III, freemason, noted wit, nudist, professional trampolinist, inventor of Sex Wax, clinical bear masturbator, original kitten-huffer, man-about-town, turnip, jack of all trades, bartender, showgirl, manatee, plum pudding, inventor of the internet, starting power forward for the University of Houston's Phi Slamma Jamma, yoga instructor, cow teat puller, self-confessed player of the "pink oboe", the first black president, Broadway actor and singer, professional gigolo, and the creator of all good things. Additionally, Wilde served as the seventeenth God from approximately 6 a.m. on June 1, 1976 until sometime later that day, when he resigned his post to try out for the Canadian Olympic curling team.

But perhaps most importantly, Oscar Wilde was the founder and chief-editor of Uncyclopædia, for the first fifty years of its existence. He is also the current chairman of Your True Masters due to him being slightly sexier than Firefox.

As you browse ED, you will see many comments from the Great Man sprinkled throughout the pages. Take special heed of these - for Oscar Wilde's insights are rarely found in this modern age.

But one must be careful - after his retirement, a number of editors added comments to Encyclopædia Dæmonica which were mistakenly attributed to Oscar Wilde. In order to ensure you are looking at a vintage, official Oscar Wilde quote, make sure it is attached to an article listed below.

If you wish to see what all the fuss is about, skim the articles below - all have been blessed by the wisdom that is Wilde.