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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Child.

They breed in the sewers...Children are silly little fnurdles (except for the fact that they don't like in technology boxes). They enjoy ruining everyone's lives while trying to make everything better at the same time. They live in these things called houses. What are houses, I wonder?

WHAT ARE HOUSES? I mean, seriously, what the hellk are these things? Front door? Kitchen? Stairwell? Loft conversion? I hate daytime television.