Cleanliness

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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Cleanliness.
81012-big.jpg This Cleanliness article smells funny

...and has been awarded an air freshener.

Cleanliness is the next-door neighbor to Godliness, and also Godliness' best friend.

Childhood[edit]

As a child, Cleanliness loved sparkly things and making things sparkle. She specialized in cleaning and polishing jewelry and precious metals. Her favorite trick was to clean pennies with an eraser. She loved to play outside with her toys, the rake, broom, wheelbarrow, and hose. Especially the hose - WATER FIGHT!!!!! Thus, the shower was born. Cleanliness also loved playing in the tub with the soap.

Teenage Years[edit]

As a teen, Cleanliness became interested in cosmetics and accessories. Her new accessories included the mop, sponge, vacuum, rubber gloves, scrubbing brush, and duster. She used a number of creams, cleansers, and polishes, such as Pine Sol, Windex, Chlorox, Comet, Brasso, Lysol, and Glade. It was during this time that Godliness moved in next door and they met and became friends while Godliness was trying to clean the church. Cleanliness helped Godliness out, lent her a few accessories, and soon the sanctuary was sparkling white and clean, and stained glass windows were shiny like gemstones instead of grimy. Even the cross in the sanctuary sparkled, and the carpet in the fellowship hall no longer had cookie crumbs and punch stains on it. This is how Godliness got associated with meaning something sparkly and special.

Young Adulthood[edit]

It was during this time that Cleanliness met her boyfriend, Mr. Clean. He came in handy in fixing up her bathroom, especially the shower. Speaking of showers, Cleanliness loved taking Mr Clean with her in the shower - it was one of their favorite activities. (Godliness would not have approved, but Cleanliness never told her about this.) Cleanliness also became interested in cars, bringing her female friends in white t-shirts to get wet washing cars. Cleanliness was very detail-oriented when it came to cars, cleaning not only the outside, but detailing the inside as well with her duster, brushes, and vacuum. In college, she had to do her own laundry for the first time, and added washing detergent and scented anti-static dryer sheets to her repertoire of cleansers.

Maturity[edit]

Finally, having graduated from SparklingClean University, it was time for Cleanliness to get a job. She worked jobs in movie theatres and sports stadiums, cleaned cages at a vet's office, worked part-time in a maid service, and finally settled down as a janitor. She got a new pet, and promptly added a lint roller to her long list of accessories. She also got a new Swiffer, but found it far more useful indoors than outdoors.