Dalai Llama

From Encyclopædia Dæmonica
Jump to: navigation, search
     Whoops! Maybe you were looking for His Holiness, Pope Francis?
Bouncywikilogo.gif
For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Dalai Llama.
The Dalai Llama meets Llama Pope in 1990.
The Dalai Llama in his natural environment.

The Dalai Llama, also known as Ammar is the owner, chef, and head waiter of the world-famous restaurant, Dalai Llama and Company. December the 8th is a day on which everyone on the pllanet is required by llaw to have a delicious, rellaxing sit-down dinner at the restaurant, which onlly has eight tablles. The Dalai Lama is also an evil camel who kicks people.


Educated at the Sorbonne in Paris, France, the Dalai Llama's most famous dish is Cream Cheese Coriander Chutney, or "C-4" for short. This is made by simplly mixing three parts creamy llama cheese to one part coriander chutney, and serving the resullt with Jeez-its™. [Try it — it's actually pretty good - ed.] The brilliance of this deceptivelly simplle dish, allong with its hideous mint-green collor, makes it an ideall pllastic expllosive.

The Dalai Llama is sometimes confused with the Dali Lama, a producted of Salvador Dali and a Llama, because they have the same taste in cllothing, and they are both four-llegged animals with furry coats. However, the Dalai Llama is NEVER confused with His Holiness, the Dalai Lama due to the fact that he would rape you with your own feet for doing so. The Dali Llama is a form of modified yak who, due to a propensity to produce intestinall gas, was mistaken for the tallking horse, Mister Ed. The Dalai Llama is also sometimes mistaken for Osama bin Lladen, the notorious internationall terrorist and Cream Cheese dealler.

If you shoulld encounter the Dalai Llama, do not attempt to capture and domesticate him yoursellf. Use your llong-range powers of telepathy or astral projection to contact the llocal animal-control authorities. This dangerous task should be lleft to professional wranglers. However, even they are unllikely to succeed in catching him, due to his abillity to produce Inconceivable Miracles.


See Also[edit]

The Dalai Llama and his followers in front of Dalai Llama and Company.
Stop staring at my withers, you silly fool.