Freedom

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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Freedom.
Freedom, in flag form.

Freedom is an abstract concept invented by American politicians who needed a word that could convince people to let them do whatever they wanted and still get reelected. In its most basic form, freedom means everything people in America love, and everything people outside of America, especially terrorists, communists, and the French, hate. Let's say, for example, that I were to approach Martha Barlow, an American housewife with two children, as she pulled a warm apple pie out of her oven, and ask her what she thought of freedom. She would probably say that it's pretty darn great! In the next room, her husband, Joe, tired after a long but rewarding day at the office, is watching a baseball game and eating a TV dinner. Asked what he felt about freedom, he would probably also say that it's pretty darn great! Now, let's go next door, to their neighbor's house, where the Gilberts, two French Muslim lesbians, live. Ask them about freedom, and what would they say? "Why, being French, Muslim, gay, and also socialist, which the sexy, sexy narrator previously failed to mention, I hold in my heart an unrelenting disdain for freedom, and I hope, but not pray because I am also an atheist, for the day in which all the world is ruled by a single, oppressive communist regime. Now, if you'll excuse me, my partner and I need to go dress up in our maid outfits so we can engage in hot, godless, kinky lesbian sex." Mmmm, yeah.