Froot

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Those obsessed with so-called-experts should thank their lucky stars that Wikipedia does not have an article about Froot.


First brought to Central America, and later Texas, by Winston Churchill, Froots are a small, rabid beast which sometimes grow up to be Big City Business-types.

With an average of 69 teeth set inside a small, snake-like face, the tusks on the bottom and top of its jaws also prove to be my worthy adversary.

A Froot usually stands at 11 inches tall, when fully erected. Balancing on its tail with the greatest of ease, it can reach heights of Russian proportions.

Fatalities[edit]

  • Jump on you many, many times when you are down. See monkey stomp.
  • Can, and will, make you eat popcorn until you die
  • The dreaded Froot Loops