Love Triangle

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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Love Triangle.
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Love Triangle is a major cornerstone in modern cinema. No joke. Christian Bale has a little thing I like to call "the King Midas effect". Everything he touches turns to SMOKING HOT. This film is no exception. Bale plays Ben Eldon-john, a successful tie designer living in South California. He's wealthy, he's handsome... and he's in a bit of a pickle! Two women stand upon his coat tails. One, a sassy city girl, editor for the fashion magazine BEND, named Marion (Kate Hudson). The other, an unemployed, free-spirited, humanitarian, half-Jew self-named Earth (Drew Barrymore). These women have two things in common. They both want Ben. And they'll do anything to get him, no matter how stale and cliche their shenanighans. And don't you worry, there's plenty of them!

A tape of Christian Bale telling a women with the name Rabarbara Jones who worked as a caterer on the movie, was leaked onto the internet. The hour long tape of Christian Bale screaming about eating all the salad she had with croutons and kicking over the table with bottled water. The tape was leaked just years after the movie was released. Bale's only statement about the tape was this. "You and me... We're fucking done. Professionally"

Love conquers. Who will get the Bale?


Directed by Michael Bay and produced by the people that brought you Police Academy 6: City Under Siege, Love Triangle is sure to delight.

Cast[edit]

  • Christian Bale as Ben Eldon
  • Kate Hudson as Marion Jensen
  • Drew Barrymore as Earth
  • Wilford Brimley as Grandpa Eldon
  • Josh Hartnett as Chansey Eldon
  • Jason Statham as Peter Fish
  • Mel Brooks as Death
  • Ernie Hudson as Himself
  • Molly Ringwald as Homeless Celia
  • Missi Pyle as Sandra Bernhard
  • Nick Nolte as Gary Busey
  • Christopher Lambert as Jason Schwartzman
  • Jim Carrey as Man in Pizza Suit
  • Billy Zane as Criminally Underused Acting Talent
  • Kevin Bacon as Cop #1
  • Kevin Bacon as Cop #2
  • Kevin Bacon as Cop #3
  • Stephen Root as Cop #4

And cameos by:

  • Kevin Spacey as Baby Malone
  • Peter Weller as God