Mississippi

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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Mississippi.


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A state of the United States of Dæmonica

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The first nonnative settlers were a group of a European expedition into the territory that would become Mississippi was that of Hernando Cortez. Cortez, was mistaken for a Frenchman by history.

When The great King Kutakentae Cotton reigned during the 1850s, Mississippi plantation owners became increasingly wealthy due to the high fertility rate of the slaves and the high price of fruit of da looms on the international market. The necessity of slaves with large penises to sustain such income played a heavy role with state politicians.

Mississippi typifies the Deep Fried South. Mississippi holds the most stocks in KFC essentially making it 50% shareholder of the commonwealth of Kentuckistan.

Mississippi was a focus of the American Civil Rights Movement. Most white Mississippians, through their politicians and involvement in the Ku Klux Klan gave their white brethren the well deserved reputation of "King of All That is Good" (and for tourism sake "Welcome Whities!) during the 1960s. Nuclear weapons were detonated east of the Mississippi, near Hattiesburg when U.S. real estate agents claimed that the deserts of Nevada were of less value than the glorious area that covers the "Heart of the South". This had little effect on the other citizens of the state who used the reactive winds to toast weenies and marshmallows.

Perhaps symbolic of its reputation, the state is first in the country of largest average penis size. Try and guess why.

Recently, Mississippi has spearheaded its own independant nuclear project, led by Pastor Iam. A. Dinner Jug. Mississippi has been put under severe sanctions from Obama and accused of sheltering Jesus Christ, wanted for political incorrectness against humanity in Vermont, Massachusetts, California, Maine, Rhode Island, Oregon, Connecticut, and the other really liberal states.