Passion Pop

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Because of their incurable biases, the so-called experts at Wikipedia will probably never have an article about Passion Pop. We are sorry they insist on being this lame.

Champagne Police Badge.

Passion Pop is a six buck bottle of tropical champagne usually consumed by Australian youth because they are unable to skunge the money up to buy anything other than this concotion. It comes in a wide range of flavors ( passionfruit, pineapple, snozeberry ).

The existence of passion pop was discovered in the basement of Oscar Wilde, who found this concotion of bad wine and great fruity flavour while trying to find a cure for cancer. And although Passion Pop does destroy cancer on contact, it is not a viable cure because it also destroys the stomach lining.

Many states have now outlawed the alchoholic beverage in order to save the lives of people jumping from roof tops to their cars.

A significant advocate of passion pop is james roberts whom often consumes vast amounts & discards empty bottles on neighbours rooftops.

jacob dell is also a master at excessive consumption of this beverage. He has been known to consume vast amounts and pass out, at which point his pants are removed and placed in the nearest available freezer.

Along with the afformentioned cancer killing toxins found in Passion pop, it also has the unique ability to grant the drinker with ESP. Some scholars believe this ability to be a hoax, seeing as how a gallon of this liquid need be consumed before such effects take place and that the "ESP" is simply alcohol poisoning and massive hallucinations.

Other scholars ( hippies ) Believe that the first group of scholars simply don't know how to "expand their minds." Below are some notable quotes from Passion pop users after drinking:

I think I'm straight now.

~ Rosie O'Donnell on Passion Pop

Jesus Christ!

~ Satan on Passion Pop

Father! Why hast thou forsaken me?!

~ Jesus on Passion Pop

Hmmmm, I think my tongue tingled. For a second.

~ Chuck Norris on Passion Pop

Isn't this just another name for water?

~ Jack Bauer on Passion Pop

Passion Pop is also the sanctioned drink of NIMH and is fully endorsed by Cthulhu.