Pink Floyd

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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Pink Floyd.
Before Starting Pink Floyd, the band had great aspirations to become Rockkets, this dream however, was a dismal failure. So they picked up guitars one day and were all of a sudden awesome.

All and all, this article's just another brick in the wall

~ Pink Floyd on the Pink Floyd article

What do you mean "Pink Floyd"? There never was any fucking Pink Floyd! I am Pink Floyd!

~ Roger Waters on Pink Floyd after two bottles of liquor

One of these days, I'm going to cut you into little pieces

~ Oscar Wilde on his breakfast

The Early Years ( 1960 - 1965 )[edit]

Members of the band agreed to name themselves "Pink Floyd" in honor of The Andy Griffith Show's Floyd the Barber, whose insistence on wearing bright neon-pink pancake makeup continues to mystify fans to this day.

Formed by Syd Barrett and Roger Waters in the early 60's, Pink Floyd ( not to be confused with Poke Floyd, Kinky Floyd, Lloyd Floyd, or Punk Floyd ) started life as a garage band. The band went through a variety of names at this stage, including, but not limited to, Alpha 19, Sigma 7, the Abdabs, the Syd Barrett Experiment, Pi π, Roger Waters the Spider, Metallica, Omega VIII, Mr. T and Me, We are Drugs, and the Screaming Abdabs. The members finally settled on naming themselves after Floyd, the flaming homosexual hair stylist character from the Andy Griffth Show. Usually they would practice at Waters until his mother got home and had to park the car, or on some occasions at Barretts where they risked being attacked by the possums who had taken up residence in the garage. It was only when the dynamic duo were at college in Cambridge that the Abdabs' full potential was realized, and twins Nick and Rick Mason joined the band to add both drums and the electric cowbell to the Abdabs' instrumental repertoire. After two years at university, the band was finally given the big break that it needed in the form of a record signing, and they knew that it was a one shot deal.

Giant Barn Dance[edit]

The Syd Barrett Experiment's Giant Barn Dance was also released under the title Whose Underpants Are These?.

Nobody knows very much about this. The Sorcerers' first psychedelic album was panned by critics for not being able to capture the essence and drugged out feel of their live shows, famous for their lighting effects and pyrotechnics. Syd Barrett, depressed by the albums lackluster reviews, began heavily using LSD, cocaine, and even began huffing kittens. This was the first catalyst in the saga of Syd's steady decline. Alot of hardcore fans call this a masterpiece but most of the hardcore fans are either dead or high on acid so we can't really trust what they say. After this Syd pulled an idea out of his ass called The Games For May

Games For May[edit]

Syd Barrett proposed that the Amazing Pudding do a big concert outside and Games For May was the result. It wasn't so much a concert as a sports event with a few sets thrown in. Waters invited fans to take part in rugby while Barrett hosted badminton and the Masons organized an ultimate frisbee tournament. Unfortunately for those taking part in rugby, Waters took the game very seriously and as in conventional rugby, gouging, punching, kicking, and biting were legal. Twenty five fans were trampled to death in the half hour long event but no charges were filed. Overall, Games For May was a success.

Nothin Much Happened...... And then Barrett left to form the Burning Banana's with Bass player Dick Hurtz, drummer/indian Monkey Lee Williams and some random guy on the street who's name we do not know. They were a band a total of 4 hours and 3 minutes. There are many rumours about why they disbanded but the most said one is that they thought Syd was always to busy looking for his pants and tripping on acid. After this event Syd decided to start another band called The New Burning Banana's but forgot to get a band so he was booed off stage. He tried one last band called The New New Burning Banana's this time getting a band of dancing indians who played bluegrass they did one show but during the show Syd ate a whole pumpkin and left the stage and the world. After death he made many solo albums.

Hazy Stage ( 1965 - 1972 )[edit]

David Gilmour and Roger Waters passionately kiss in front of their fans. Note that Kurt Cobain and Krist Novoselic had more success making out in the nineties.

The Barrettless Floyd launched onto the English music scene in a blaze of no publicity at all, making it hard for them to get another record deal. The perpetual onslaught of name changes did not alleviate this. They did a few soundtracks for movies like More and Mission: Impossible but none of the Floyds, specifically Roger Waters, were satisfied with any of their work so far. At this point, everyone in the Floyd was more or less broke so they began sharing a tiny, grimy, but thankfully rent controlled flat in Cambridge. Life for the bandmates soon began to resemble a sitcom. Roger unfortunately cooked all of their meals which usually involved cabbage and water ( which was included as a free utility ) and the other bandmembers used to rag on him about his cooking, except for Dave who was smitten by Waters giggly personality and good looks. It was not long until Roger realized that he and Dave were meant to be and they began dating, making band outings increasingly awkward for twins Nick and Rick. The band continued to struggle to make ends meet. The income from the frequent gigs that played in the various clubs in around Cambridge was Paltry, and Dave's male modeling did not pay much either. Roger was determined to bring the band to the next level, financially and musically.

A Saucerful of Sucrets[edit]

The follow up album to GummaUmma, A Saucerful of Sucrets did not help to dispell the commonly held belief that the Floyd was a sci-fi band and actually fueled the myth. This left Roger in a fluster because most people missed the main theme of the album, which was a cough that had been plagueing the band for well over a year. As the story goes, Nick gave it to Rick, Rick gave it to Dave, and Dave gave it to Roger who continued the vicious cycle by giving it back to Nick. Eventually they all decided to split for two weeks and the cough terror was ended. Sales for A Saucerful were considerably better than those for GummaUmma and the Floyd was sure that it was on it's way to superstardom.


The Floyd's next album was considered by some to be even worse than Giant Barn Dance, but it sold better and supplemented their income considerably. Roger began to get his hopes up and pushed his bandmates even harder than he had before, allowing them to get a slightly bigger apartment that would allow for them to sleep in seperate beds. Nonstop gigging and driving from venue to venue imposed a tight schedule on the Floyd and left little time for anything else, so sleeping and eating were done in their questionable transport made of two halves of two different cars. According to Dave, Nick and Rick had to constantly apply duct tape to keep the shaky auto together. For some reason, people began to think that Pink Floyd was a sci-fi oriented band around this time which Roger greatly resented.

At-Home-Tart Mother[edit]

The Pink Floyds 1968 Album was panned by PETA.

This was more a setback for the Floyd than a step forward. In a bizarre burst of inspiration, Roger used all of the profits from A Saucerful of Sucrets to hire the London Symphony Orchestra out for half an hour and got some of the janitors from the Floyds Cambridge Flat to do vocals in a strange symphonic piece. The rest of the band was furious when they found out what Roger had done while they were out, and had thought it initially suspicious that Waters had given them money to buy some new satin shirts and tight pants. To compromise, Roger allowed Nick and Rick to use a photo of a cow they had taken while picknicking in the dorset countryside for the album cover. The cow also colaborated with vocals in the closing piece, entitled "Lulubelle's Progressive Lunch".

The Golden Years ( 1972 - 1980 )[edit]

The Wizard of Oz soundtrack[edit]

The Wizard of Oz soundtrack ( less commonly known as Dark Side of the Moon ) shot the Floyd to superstardom as basically the best album of all time. Disgusted by Rogers previous folly, the Floyd set out to do something that no one had done before, though they didn't know exactly what. At one of their weekly brainstorming sessions, Roger began moping about how he was buttsore about the death of his father and Rick followed suit in complaining about how hard it was to make a buck. Soon everyone at the table was complaining about something or other, and this gave Dave a stupendous idea. Why not write an album about everything that made them buttsore? Roger and Dave soon began work on what was to be Dark Side Of The Moon. Upon release, sales exploded into the millions, billions, and trillions. The cosmic sales figures, according to many scientists, prove that time travel and time tourism exist, or else such figures could not exist. Engineer Dr. Alan Parsons didn't make any money, leading him to invent evil weapons such as the death laser and The Project. The Floyd became world famous, and with the advent of a megatour looming, the four bandmates designed a stageshow that can could cause tinitus from several miles distant.

Wish You Had Beer[edit]

This album was dedicated mainly to Syd Barrett who had more or less faded out of the lives of everyone in the band ( though Roger Waters decided to act as if he cares, and shamelessly romanticized the story ). Strangely enough, during recording Syd showed up in the studio with a huge keg to say a big hello to his former bandmates who were surprised to see that he was still the svelt young hippie that he was ten years ago. Wish You Had Beer did not sell nearly as well as any of the Floyds work in the previous years but went to new heights musically. Ironically, no one has ever been plastered during the playing of this song.


The album cover of Animals

By far the Floyds most experimental work, this album features songs equating certain kinds of people with pigs, sheep, and ostriches. Roger explained the album in depth in an interview, saying that the pigs represent social crusaders and greedy buisinessmen, also known as The Man. Many assumed this was a statement about Jews, but it was actually about the Government, mostly George Dubya Bush. She sheep represent people who shop at Hot topic, and the ostriches represent those jerks that cut you off in traffic. The highly electronic songs are perpetuated by howls and shrieks that some say are doctored animal noises, but are in fact the pained screams of Roger Waters getting a colonoscopy without anasthesia or sedatives. "They costed extra" explained the ever frugal Roger, years later.

The Wall[edit]

Roger still had not gotten the moping out of his system and decided to write an entire double album about how his father had been killed in World War II. The other Floyds were sceptical, but the early demo tapes sounded halfway decent so they decided to go along with it. Fortunately for the band, The Wall sold just as well as Dark Side of the Moon allowing David Gilmour to buy himself a small South Pacific Island nation and for him and Roger to relax in. Nick and Rick pursued other hobbies and purchased a yacht with which they sailed the seven seas and had some crazy adventures involving pirates and Canadian monks. Amid all of the ridiculous self indulgence, Roger had begun production on a movie version of The Wall starring 2pac and the Village people. When the movie was released, it grossed a record 500 000 000 million dollars at the box office in it's first night alone and was voted most depressing film of all time. During production, it is a fact that 2pac attempted suicide because "it was getting me down". Dave proposed that the Floyd take The Wall on the road and do a supertour of the world which sounded good to everyone else except Syd who was a tad bit angry over the whole getting kicked out of the band before it made a lot of money thing. The Wall live is the highest costing concert ever performed, costing at least five million dollars per show due to its lavish set, pyrotechnics, light show, hired strippers, blow-up dolls, and musical ensemble. The Floyd constructed a hulking wall across the stadiums that connected to the Great Wall of China. Although it cost five million dollars to perform one show, Pink Floyd grossed an average 6 trillion per show, even though the stadiums they played could only house about an 45,000 people. Reporetdly, at every show a strange man in a hood claiming to be from the future would apppear at each show and leave 5.9 trillion dollars saying that the Pink Floyd must receive this money so they can take control of the entire world. Obiviously, he must have done something wrong, since the members of the band no longer recall ever being in the band together.

Live 1970s Footage[edit]

Depending on who you ask, there may or may not exist pro-shot live footage of the band playing from the golden years. Here are some quotes from the band members on the subject:

"You can't have it!" - Nick Mason

"Conspiracy|Doesn't exist." - Roger Waters

"Uhh, legal problems have forced me to uhh, delay the release of new video footage." - David Gilmour

"I think at the time we were being filmed." - Rick Wright

The Post Waters Floyd ( 1980 - 2007 )[edit]

After The Wall, Roger grew bored with the Floyd and wanted out causing conflicts in his relationship with Dave. One tragic night in 1980, Roger strangled, kicked, beat, punched, flagellated, burned, and stabbed Dave upon learning that he wished their relationship to end. In the chaos, Dave struggled to a phone and called Nick and Rick, who rushed to their cambridge flat and quickly restrained Roger while Dave called the cops. Roger faced five years in jail for assault and battery but Dave decided not to press charges and got a restraining order instead. Through all this, the Floyd lived on and the band completed several projects in this time period. N.B. - Roger Waters has recently claimed responsibility for the Hurricane Floyd of 1999. Closer inspection of the satellite images reveals said hurricane looking uncannily like a Wizard of Oz Soundtrack vinyl.

Hurricane Floyd, created by the notorious Roger Waters, heads for Pink Floyd's rehearsal studios prior to their secret gig on the White House lawn.

A Momentary Lapse Of Grandma[edit]

Pink Floyd released this comeback album in 1987. However, fans were shocked at the complete lack of grandma in the album, unlike all previous Floyd albums. It sold exactly 1 and a half copies worldwide.


In February of 2005, there was a short Pink Floyd reunion, with Special Guest Lance Armstrong, at Bob Geldof's Glastonbury AIDS benefit concert. Roger and Dave talked for the first time in twenty years and realized that they were always meant for each other and got back together, though according to Nick and Rick, Pink Floyd has disbanded for the time being. The only member of the band not present was Syd Barrett, the best one.


Members of the band frequently released solo projects. Among these are:

Dave Gilmour[edit]

"David Gilmour And His Band Of Mexican Little People" ( 1979 )

"My 2nd Solo Album" ( 1980 )

"It's Me Without Pink Floyd" ( 1982 )

"About Facials" ( 1984 )

"You know i'm right" ( 1987 )

"I can write lyrics too" ( 1991 )

"With a little help from my wife of course" ( 1991 )

"I am the shining one" ( 1992 )

"Exented cover of "Mountain Jam" from the allman brothers with extended guitar solos and a special hour long guest appearance of rick wright on synth"( 1994 ) Quadruple box set

"True latent" ( 2000 )

"On A Island With Tom Hanks" ( 2006 )

"Someone Help Tom Hanks Is Scary" ( 2008 )

Roger Waters[edit]

"Several Suspicious Criminals Groveling Together in a Cave" ( with Brion Ferry of the art-rock trio Taxidermy-- 1971 )

"The Wall" ( 1979 )

"Oh! Lonely Me!" ( 1984 )

"The Album With Some Chick's Bare Ass On The Cover" ( 1984 )

"Should Sucked it up" ( 1985 )

"TV I.N.S.A.N.I.T.Y" ( 1987 )

"Sniff The Glove" ( 1920 ) ( Featuring the musical talents of Ben Affleck and the Sunshine Boys )

The Wall ( 1985 )

"Run Hedgehog, Run" ( 1985 )

Toys in the Basement: Roger Takes Back His Hits ( 1986 ) Featuring: "Another Crack on the Floor" "Wish you were Near" "The Lightside of the Moon" "Bartering" "Uncle, my uncle, up periscope" "Have a New Car" "On the Bench" "Suffocate" "Cluttered Cubicals" "Old Impotence" "Hello Sweet Planet!" "Everyone's Here" "The solid ground" "Go" "Inside the fence"

The Wall ( Locked Up Behind Again )( 1992 )

"Muse to Death" ( 1993 ) ( Conceptual album,talking about how Waters hate the new band that sound like Radiohead )

The Wall ( Now where Did I put Those Keys? )( 1998 )

The Wall ( Oh No, Not Locked Up Behind It Again!!! ) ( 2004 )

Syd Barrett ( all released posthumously )[edit]

"Another Giant Barn Dance" ( 1967 )

"I'm Siting And Playing Guitar Record It! ( 1969 )

"One Minute With Syd Reading Playboy" ( 1969 )

"Another Minute With Syd Reading Playboy" ( 1970 )

"Hey How Am I Still Releasing Albums?" ( 1972 )

"This Is Pretty Groovy" ( 1973 )

"I Know Where Syd Barrett Lives Because I Am Syd Barrett" ( 1973 )

"Hey I Use To Be In That Band" ( 1973 )

"Where Are My Pants?" ( 1974 )

"Hey There's My Pants!" ( 1974 )

"Damn I Lost My Pants Again" ( 1974 )

"The Apple Pie Man" ( 1974 )

"Sing a Song of Sixpence" ( 1975 )

"I Enjoy LSD Sandwichs" ( 1975 )

"I've Got some Tarts" ( 1976 )

"Tweedledum and Tweedledee" ( 1977 )

"The Fucker was Fucked" ( 1978 )

"Where the Fuck Am I?"

"When the Fuck Am I?" ( released somewhere in time )

"Why the Fuck Am I?"

"Who " " " "?"

"What? Where? Why? Meaning Of Life?"

"Murder Monkey Sex Fest Of Death ( A Death Metal Album by Syd Barrett ) ( 1992 )

"Duets With John Madden" ( 1994 )

"Down In The Hood" ( 1995 )

"Getting Back To My Roots And Finding My Pants" ( 1995 )

"The Original Gangster Syd Barrett" ( 1996 )

"Thug Live With Syd" ( 1997 )

"Not My Mary Jane!" ( 1999 )

"Naked Ballads With 2Pac" ( 2001 )

"The Best Of Syd Barrett Vol.1 ( 2001 )

"The Best Of Syd Barrett Vol.2 ( 2002 )

His latest release is a collaboration with Sandi Thom, a punk rocker with flowers in her hair, a single called "I Wish I Was There Back Again With Guitar In My Hand". An another recent collaboration is a song about Syd's former band, Pink Floyd, called "My band" and features Eminem as a smacker. A Senegal-born r'n'b artist Akon has recently made a remix, called "Smack That".

Barret's career ended when he realized that his experiment to make the world utterly hate him had failed. Barret tried to make the public think he was just a dope who tripped on shrooms and wrote down the stupidest thing he could think of. Unfortunately, the vast majority of the filthy hippies had too much wax in their ears(and possibly brains) to realize that his lyrics were broad generalizations that could be taken any way a certain person wanted. Upon realizing that humanity was so brain dead, he withdrew from society, only to ever talk to his plants and an imaginary cat named Bootsie. He then died and marijuana abusers everywhere weeped for their embarrassed hero. He never found his pants again.

Nick Mason[edit]

Nick Mason's solo project surfaced in 1976 called "Look at me - I'm a racer now!", also known as the Status Quo's whole album "You're a racer now" cover version, but it turned out that the album was only about racing, planes, snakes on planes, counting teeth and speaking to mr Mason while he cuts You into little pieces. A single released to promote the album was called "One of these days has come, muahahahahahahahaha!!!" He later resurfaced in the mid to late nineties with Mötley Crüe and later began running with the Grateful Dead. He also helped Queen on their "Flash Gordon" soundtrack project.

Rick Wright[edit]

"I'm in Pink Floyd! Really!" ( 1972 )

"The Advenures of Robin Hoode and his Bande of Merrie Men" ( 1974 )

"Mood Music for 'Little House on the Prarie'" ( 1976 )

"Continuium" ( 1977 )

"Zzzzzzzee" ( 1977 )

"Wet Dream" ( 1978 ) ( no, really!! )

"Wet Dream Pt.2 I need a new bed" ( 1979 )

"Wet Dream Pt.3 Ok Someone Help!" ( 1980 )

"Wet Dream Pt.4 I'm Drowning Now" ( 2004 )

"Wet Dream Pt.5 Why Is My Penis Doing This?" ( 2005 )

"Revenge Roger Revenge!" ( 2007 )

Oscar Wilde, the pink one[edit]

... naah ...

See Also[edit]