“Dam'n! I love a letter with curveS.”
~ Oscar Wilde on S
“S and Me are very good friendS. Lets face it, you can't have Sex without it.”
~ George Bush on S
“When I look back on the dayS of creation, I really wish I could have thought up the letter S. But, juSt when I was about to, some jackaSS went and did it. I tell you, I just about Smited him right there. But I am a God of mercy and love, beSideS, he did a pretty good job. Dam'n Sexy letter if I do Say So mySelf.”
~ God on S
The Letter S: The Beginning
The letter S waS created Shortly after the invention of Sex in 1432. At firSt, the creator of Sex found the act impoSSible due to the lack of the firSt letter, the letter S. Originally it waS regarded aS the leproSy of the Alphabet, but after Pope John the Thirty-Twelvth waS Saved from an embarraSSing threeSome by the letter, it became one of the moSt popular memberS of the Alphabet Club. ItS popularity is evident in culture today, aS it iS now Superman'S emblem of justice. Oh, yeah, it'S true; He didn't juSt put it there becauSe hiS name Started with it, he put it there becauSe He'S a big, Catholic Stud.
The Letter S: Today
NowadayS, the letter SpendS moSt of its time with itS two curvy endS wrapped around some braSSy blondes while being photographed for the cover page of ESquire. It also makeS public appearanceS aS a children'S Slide. Recent allegations regarding the aforementioned Service have lead the public to believe that the letter is a filthy Stinking paedophile, but fanS of the letter Say that that'S juSt becauSe the letter haS Catholic rootS.
The Long S ( ſ )
The long s ( ſ ), iſ what the letter "ſ" tendſ to look like when it getſ a boner. It ſometimeſ has a ſtub on the left, but don't mind that, it'ſ juſt one of the poßible ſide-effectſ of circumciſion.