Sandra Bullock

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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Sandra Bullock.
Isn't she lovely?

Married to outlaw Jesse James.[edit]

Famous for Infamous

Tamia, why the F did you have to ruin Speed II with your stupid music?! Perhaps you should have committed suicide instead of Phyllis Hyman!

~ Sandra Bullock on shitty Tamia music

In Soviet Russia, Congeniality misses YOU!

~ Russian Reversal on Miss Congeniality

In Soviet Russia, Congeniality 2 misses YOU too!

~ Russian Reversal on Miss Congeniality 2

I think you're gorgeous too, I want to kiss you too, I want to hug you too, I want to marry you too! (singing)

~ Oscar Wilde on Benjamin Bratt

Sandra Bullock is a well known intranational spy and police officer, whose stunts are widely recognised by people living both in the past and future. Her life story is semi-exactly drawn on celluloid canvas of several documentaries like "Speed", "Net", "Miss Congeniality" and "Demolition Man" among others. The way her nose is crooked is incredibly sexy.

Story of life[edit]

Early life[edit]

Sandra Bullock was born in 1964. Her birth was followed by attending some school where she occasionally beat up boys and scared geeks. Not much more is known about her early life, thus some may speculate that her days were filled with studying Russian and the fine use of guns.

Mid-twenties[edit]

Why did Fortis ever allow Tamia write a song for Speed 2?

~ Sandra Bullock on Fortis

As a charming maiden in her mid-twenties Sandra managed to become popular as a reckless bus driver; a lonely ticket officer madly in love with a sleeping man; and a scared hacker, who discovered that an IP address actually can be longer than 32 bits and a virus written for a Mac can also infect a Big Blue mainframe. While her stunts caused harm to respected companies and buildings she was never criminally punished because she herself was part of the jurusdiction and was therfore obviously exempt from any kind of prosecution and jail sentence.

Early thirties[edit]

Returning to a life of a practising witch, Sandra realized that this is not her true destiny. Having forgotten her social skills as a young hot mama, she became a disgruntled agent who didn't care about her looks and eventually embraced the habit of snoring while laughing. Still some of her charms remained and this led her to Miss America contest. Receiving the award of Miss Congeniality, Sandra suddenly discovered the need of world peace and also peace within which led her to practice as a non-salaried lawyer.

Sixties[edit]

A brief glimpse of Sandra's future in 2030-s can also be seen in documentary "Demolition man", where Sandra has totally forgotten her violent roots and has become a sweet police officer having developed reluctance against male touches. Thus she has developed an electronic device for compensation. Despite her old age Sandra looks better than ever.

Men in her life[edit]

Sandra has not been very successful in her relationships. Being an eccentric, shy, violent and lovely neurotic has made her relationships fragile and immature, hardly lasting longer than couple of years or even months. It is interesting to note that when she switches jobs old relationships are broken and new are made. Most notable guest stars in her love life have been Keanu Reeves, Hugh Grant and Sylvester Stallone, but recently married to Jessie James of West Coast Choppers but shacked-up with William Shatner.

See also[edit]