Sherlock Holmes

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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Sherlock Holmes.


Sherlock Holmes is a famous author who wrote many mystery novels starring his fictional protagonist Sir Arthur Conan O'Brien. He is also known for spreading rumors and lies about himself to hype up his upcoming novels. For example, when he wrote his novel Sir Arthur Conan O'Brien and the Case of the Mysterious Case he claimed he was an astronaut in several interviews, and even went so far as to fake the moon landing just to hype up the book. One of his greatest zings was to actually convince the majority of the population that he was a fictional character.

His book Sir Arthur Conan O'Brien and the Case of the Mystery is famous for popularizing the use of cluons.

Holmes in his student days
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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Sherlock Holmes.

Fun facts[edit]

  1. Believed by many to be a fictional 19th century detective, created by William Shakespeare. Famous for his catch phrase "It's intermediate, Watson, you imbecile", the first ever recorded use of a catch phrase. He also solved a lot of crimes; for example, the one leading to the famous case Sherlock Holmes v. Godzilla.
  2. Accredited with the discovery of the Elementary System of the Period.
  3. A method used by elementary school teachers to hammer in the names of the Great Lakes into their pupils heads, with each letter corresponding to one of the lakes: H- Huron; O-

Ontario; L- Lacrymosa; M- Mississippi; E- Eglantine; S- Steve

  1. The true name of Jack the Ripper. Sherlock would pretend to be a detective in order to study people and find the best ways to kill them.
Holmes was as keen as a hound


  1. Father of John Holmes, the late porno actor who is the father of Katie Holmes, and Noe , who married Jack Schitt, and took the name Noe Shit-Sherlock.
  2. Holmes is revered in African American culture; young black men often greet one another using the name of the famous detective, typically in the process of asking what, if anything, is up ( or, in the vernacular, "'sup" ).
  3. Sherlock Holmes is said to have sworn an eternal vendetta on the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen when denied admission. The League spokesman reportedly said, "Sorry old chap, but we're a bit full at the moment, and we're not kicking Mina out to make room. Sorry!"
  4. He has sued Arthur Conan Doyle von Frankenstein ( The Misfits ) because of an illegal use of his name. The main character in Arthur Conan Doyle von Frankenstein's books is called Sherlock Holmes.
  5. He is the grandfather of Katie Holmes. The latter is not as intelligent as he used to be, however.
  6. When he became bored with the 19th century, Holmes called on some favours owed to him by Dr. Who and travelled to the 21st century where he became an actor and played Gil Grissom in CSI.
  7. Gregory House, the main character of the FOX TV show House MD, is said to be roughly based off of Sherlock Holmes. Holmes, needless to say, was rather offended by this, saying that House is a fraud and uses nowhere near the appropriate amount of drugs.