“It's key to beating the Brits”
~ Andrew Jackson on The Long Tetris Block
The Long Tetris Block is a famous video game character from the "Tetris" series. The Long Tetris Block is one of seven characters who have appeared in every Tetris game to date, and is likely the most well known. He is known for showing up late to parties, and appearing when he is not wanted. However, when he shows up on time, he really knows how to throw a party, and this leads to a love-hate relationship with many gamers.
The Long Tetris Block, born in the year 1895, gained fame in 1946 with his first video game, "Tetris." Since then, he has appeared in several other games, including "Tetris," "Tetris 2," "Tetris," "Tetris 64," "Tetris DS," and "Tetris." He has long had a problem with showing up on time. Often, his 6 friends will throw a party for him, and will wait until they hit their upper limits for him to show up. On the rare occasions he does show up, he really knows how to get down, and this often helps his relationship, which he really enjoys. After all, he's only trying to fit in.
He is also known for showing up early to parties. When this happens, he will often help out with the preparations, and later fail to show up until the party is over.
The Long Tetris Block has appeared in every Tetris game to date. All Tetris games, along with the underdog Long Tetris Block, involve complex and utterly coherent stories that involve bringing down capitalism by electing Stalin as the president of the Earth. These games, while popular among gamers, are often criticised for their lack of relevance to real life as Stalin has been dead since 2004. Some critics say it was Russia's goal all along, some critics argue that capitalist gamers should get lives noting that there is no link between Mario, Tetris, and Russia.
The Long Tetris Block had 6 friends, who appear alongside him in the starring roles of every "Tetris" game:
- The Square Thing
- The Squiggly Thing
- The Backwards Squiggly Thing
- The L-Shaped Block
- The Backwards-Facing L-Shaped Block
- Al Gore, the famed 10x10 square block
Occasionally, the Long Tetris Block comes at the height of sexual tension at a party, and it results in a massive orgy. It looks like he is fitting into a vertical gap between masses of other Tetris characters, and once he is in, a wide rectangle is formed. These rectangles, however, have always proven to be existentially challenged, so their fun is short-lived.
This is the goal of most Tetris players, so it would be very accurate to say that the Long Tetris Block gets a lot of action. In fact, this is so important to players that it has come to be called a tetris. The only reason this game is not taking fire for its sexual nature is because it is so subtle, that even most of those who play it don't realize this.