Toto

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I don't know why, but when I listen to this band, I always get hungry

~ Oscar Wilde on Toto

I'm melting.....I'm melting....

~ Noel Coward on Toto

Toto ( IPA pronunciation: /ˈtoʊʊʊʊʊtoʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊʊ/, early known as Tituo ) is a popcorn and marriage music making Gypsy band that was founded in 1976 by some of the most popular professional session gypsies of the mythology era.

Their name comes from the Japanese manufacturer of bathroom fixtures, including sinks, toilets and bathtubs. Toto members become very angry when people think that they got their name from a gorilla named Toto, or even worse, if they translated something from Latin. "We hate Brazil!" they say. Other's state that they took the name to prove "they weren't in the band Kansas anymore".

Always known that Gypsies are the most talented musicians on earth, Toto play all kinds of earth genres, including: monkey music, regressive rock, Jazz, Michael Jackson shit, Tallava, Soul, F for P Punk, and fuckin' everything else...

History[edit]

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For those with more Christian tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Toto.

Formation[edit]

Toto was as a group of six of the most sought-after marriage music makers of the 1970's. Prior to the band's formation in 1977, the members of Toto were regulars on marriages by the likes of Steely Dan, Seals and Crofts, Boz Scaggs, Bill Clinton, Osama Bush Lady, and many others.

Tituo[edit]

Perhaps the most strangely named of Toto's albums was the 1981 release "Somewhere over Richie Blackmore's Rainbow".

Their first album, Tituo ( wrongly written after many repetitious attemptings to write it correctly ) was released in 1978. The album spread very quickly on the marriage sales all over the world. Toto members were very surprised of the large sales did this album and their guitarist and main popcorn maker, Lukie, proclaimed: If we knew that we are such talented, we would never made those fuckin' popcornes on those Japanese flush toilets. But I'm still proud that I used that stuff, since I was inspired for the band name.

Hydra[edit]

Their next album Hydra was released in 1979. Their angel drummer, Jeff Porcaro, says that the album name was inspired by a hydra he saw on he's flush toilet when he was making popcornes. "I swear it was a big octopus" he sad in the first interviews, however, other band members realized that it was just a hydra, and then they named the album after it. To this day, Jeff Porcaro still bothers God that what he saw was a big octopus.

Toto 007[edit]

Toto 007, released in 1982, was their climax of the best marriage selling album. Everyone liked it. Many attempted attacks were made unsuccesfuly on band members. The only reason was jealousy. Sir Michael Retard Jacksonofabitch proclamed that he was afraid that he's shit will loose its popularity. However, Toto survived, and they continued their perfect popcorn career.

Popcorn period[edit]

Suddenly, Toto realized that they are getting more money from popcornes than from music. Under the pressure from commerce, they dropped their instruments and became serious about popcornes making techniques. Lukie, proclaimed in a CNN interview, that "he practices making popcornes 'till he bleeds". This signed out the starting of their professional popcorn making career. They became very wealthy, positioning themselves under Bill Gates on the Billboard 200 "The most wealthy musicians". However, while making popcornes, high temperatures surrounding them were very frustrating. They started cursing temperature.

Returning to their roots and Fahrenheit[edit]

Temperature was the cause that Toto got their instruments again and started making only music. Their frustrational period influenced them to write a concept album that deals with mercilessnes of high temperatures. The album was named Fahrenheit.

After numerious other albums, Toto begun to make popcornes again, but this time, just for hobbie.

Lineup[edit]

Current members[edit]

  • Boby Kimball - vocals
  • Steve Lukather a.k.a. Lukie - guitar, vocals, and main popcorn maker
  • David Paich - keyboards, popcorns, and Vocals
  • Greg Phillinganes - keyboards, Michael Jackson, popcorns, and vocals
  • Simon Phillips - drums
  • Mike Porcaro - bass

Aditional musicians[edit]

  • Santa Claus - bass
  • Jordan Rudess - additional popcorn maker
  • Jon Anderson - official popcorn tester

Discography[edit]

Studio albums[edit]

Live albums[edit]

  • 1993 - Live at Mohammad Marriage ( 2CD + interview with Mohammad )